Happy Birthday Tom Brady…Here’s Our Birthday Card To YouAugust 3, 2012
We just wanted to give Tom Brady a birthday card in the form of a rambling blog post.
Tom Brady, you are 35 years old today. Your wife is bad…like super bad on an international level and she’s Brazilian too?!?! SMH.
It really sucks that you have to be in training camp on your birthday. Hopefully, Giselle can sneak in for a umm…conjugal visit. Sorry about that Super Bowl lost last year. We really thought you had it. You’re now 3-2 in Super Bowls…and 0-2 against New York..and you live in Boston, ouch bro.
Ya know…I really hate that you’re with Under Armour, but it’s your birthday so we won’t talk about that.
Thanks for choosing to play football and not some other lame California sport like Water Polo or some shit like that. You’re like an All-American story. California kid, goes to Michigan…doesn’t really play…late round draft pick…becomes the starter in his second season and then you just blow up! It’d be really cool if you played for the Cardinals because we could call you “The Phoenix”, you know…because you rose from the depths of nothing. Like the good nothing you know…good California upbringing…really good Big Ten school, but still being drafted in the 6th round isn’t fun, and you made it man. But if you played for the Cards then we couldn’t call you Captain America, that makes sense because you play for the Patriots…you know…America’s team before Jerry Jones stole the nickname.
Gosh, I’ve been talking forever. Either way dude, happy 35th birthday. Give Giselle a kiss for me, or just let me kiss her. I’m a huge Gronk fan, but I like Hernandez a lot more..he’s just cooler. Can you throw the ball to him more?
Happy 35th birthday T-Money!